sex? Intercourse? do not have? Teenagers ponder evolving definitions and habits

San Francisco — Situationship. The “sneaky link” “conversation stage” is the stage of getting to know like-minded people, usually through text messaging, which can lead to a relationship.

Sexual intercourse among high school students is declining. Research says so. But that doesn’t mean you’re having less sex.

Young people’s language of love and lust, and the actions behind it, are evolving. And experts say the shift is not well captured in national studies.

Over the years, studies have shown that sex rates among American high school students have declined. Not surprisingly, that trend continued in the first few years of the pandemic, according to a recent study by the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. According to the survey, 30% of teens in 2021 will say they have had sex, down from 38% in 2019, more than half of teens reported having had sex in 30 years. Significantly reduced compared to before.

The Associated Press communicated the findings to teenagers and experts across the country and asked for their interpretation. Parents: Some answers may surprise you.

What Sex Means: Depends Who You Ask

First, what is the definition of sex?

“Hmm. That’s a good question,” says Rose, a 17-year-old New England high school student.

She thought about it for about 20 seconds, listing various possibilities for relationships between heterosexual, oral sex, same-sex or LGBTQ partners. On her campus, short-term dating, known as “situationship,” is typically low-commitment and high-risk, both from a health and emotional standpoint.

There is also a “sneaky link” to contact your friends secretly. “I feel like more people are having sex, but it’s not necessarily between men and women.”

For today’s teens, the conversation about sexuality has moved from a binary situation to a spectrum, and the types of sex people engage in are changing as well. And while the vocabulary of sex has changed, the main question in the CDC survey has remained the same since the agency began its biannual survey in 1991: “Have you had sex?” Have you?”

“Honestly, that question is kind of funny,” says Kay, an 18-year-old who identifies as queer and attends a public high school near Lansing, Michigan. “There are probably a lot of teens who are like, ‘No, I’ve never had sex, but I’ve had other kinds of sex.'”

The Associated Press agreed to use the teenager’s first or middle name for this article because of shared concerns about backlash in schools, homes and social media for them talking about their peers’ sex lives and LGBTQ+ relationships. This is because the

Evolving Sexual Identity

Multiple experts say the CDC findings suggest changes in the evolution of teenage sexuality, such as gender fluidity becoming more common, along with less stigma against identifying as non-heterosexual. It is possible that

They point to another finding in this year’s study that the proportion of high school students who identify as heterosexual has dropped from about 89% in 2015, when the CDC began asking about their sexual orientation, to about 75%. ing. Meanwhile, 15% of people identify as lesbian, gay or bisexual, up from 8% in 2015.

“How would the question be worded differently if young people were present when the question was formulated,” said Taryn Gall, executive director of the Michigan Youth Sexual Health Organization. I just wonder,” he said.

Sex is just one of the topics covered in a CDC study called the Youth Risk Behavior Study. One of the leading sources of national data on a range of high school student behaviors, it is administered biennially and asks approximately 100 questions on subjects such as smoking, drinking, drug use, bullying, gun ownership and sex. is done. More than 17,000 students from 152 public and private high schools nationwide responded to the 2021 survey.

“This is a fine line that we must strive to walk,” says Kathleen Etier, director of the CDC’s Youth and School Health Division, which is leading the study.

From a methodological point of view, changing the question makes it difficult to compare trends over time. The goal is to take a national snapshot of teen behavior, knowing that questions may not capture all nuances. “There are some areas where you can’t really dig as deep as you would like,” Eatier said.

For example, the national survey did not ask about oral sex, which carries the risk of spreading STDs. Regarding “intercourse,” Ettier said, “We recognize that we do not encompass all ways young people define sex, and we strive to use terms that young people can understand.” said.

Is Declining Teenage Sex Good News?

Beyond semantics, there are many theories as to why reported high school sex rates are steadily declining and what that says about American society.

“I think some parents are happy, some are worried, and I think there’s probably good reason for both,” said Sharon Huber, co-director of the University of Maryland National School Mental Health Center. says. Health officials want to know trends that could lead to fewer teenage pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections.

“But what we don’t know is what this means for the trajectory of young people,” says Hoover.

This year’s decline is the steepest ever recorded and apparently has a lot to do with the pandemic that has left children isolated, disconnected from friends and immersed in social media. . Even after life began to return to normal, many children found face-to-face interactions uncomfortable and found their verbal communication skills declining, Hoover said.

The survey was conducted in the fall of 2021, just as many K-12 students returned to face-to-face classrooms after a year of online school.

Several teens interviewed said they returned with strong social unrest when schools reopened, as well as fear of contracting the coronavirus. This added a new layer to pre-pandemic concerns about sexual relationships, such as pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections.

“I remember thinking, ‘What if I get sick? What if I don’t have the interpersonal skills to handle this?'” says Kay, 18, from Michigan. Told. “All these ‘what ifs’ have definitely impacted my personal relationships and the way I relate to strangers and personal partners.”

Another fear is parental curiosity, says college student Abbie Tow. She wonders if helicopter parents are playing a role in what she calls “the babyification of our generation.” A senior at the University of Oklahoma, Tou knows a college student whose parents use tracking apps to monitor their whereabouts.

“Parents received push notifications when students left and returned to their dormitories,” says Deng, a 22-year-old major in social work and gender studies.

Ms. Deng also noticed a “general disillusionment” with her generation. She cited statistics that fewer teens are getting driver’s licenses today. “I think there’s a correlation between a student being able to drive a car and a student having sex,” she says.

Another cause of declining sex rates could be easy access to online pornography, experts say. A report released earlier this year by nonprofit child advocacy group Common Sense Media found that by the age of 17, three-quarters of teens had viewed porn online and were exposed to it for the first time. The average age is 12 years old.

“Porn is becoming sex education for young people,” says Justin Fonte, a New York-based sex educator. She says porn shapes and distorts adolescents’ ideas about sex, power and intimacy. “You can rewind, fast forward, and play as long as you want. You don’t have to worry about how the other person feels.”

Is the definition of consent evolving?

Experts say the decline is partly due to a broader understanding of consent and an increase in “holistic” sex education being taught in many schools, which has been targeted in the ongoing culture wars. He said he hopes it will.

Unlike abstinence-only programs, lessons include discussions about healthy relationships, gender identity, understanding sexual orientation, and preventing unplanned pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. Contrary to what critics think, young people are more likely to delay sexual initiation if they get sex education, she said.

Some schools and organizations supplement sex education with peer counseling, where teens are encouraged to talk to each other about relationships and other topics that young people may feel uncomfortable discussing with adults. are trained to

Annika, 14, is a peer ambassador trained by Family Planning and a high school freshman in Southern California. She provides guidance to her friends in her toxic relationships and is concerned about the prevalence of pornography among her co-workers, especially male friends. It’s clear to her that the pandemic is interfering with her sex life.

A 2023 study now underway by the CDC will clarify whether this decline is temporary. Ms. Anika suspects that Spike will appear. At least at her school, her students seem to be making up for lost time.

“People are hungry for more because they lost those two years,” she says. She often found the couple at the stall next to her having sex in the school restroom.

Again, what is your definition of sex? “Any sexual act,” says Anika. “And intercourse is also a kind of act.”

A truly accurate reading of teenage sexuality requires consideration of the evolution of language, said Dr. John Santelli, a professor of adolescent sexuality at Columbia University.

“The word intercourse used to mean something else,” he points out. “In the old days, sex meant just talking.”